here's alittle reearch i got about the Devil i loathe... these are apparently his thoughts... from his little hell called his puny brain... (note: the Luna mentioned in here is my girlfriend...)
Oh yes, it's fun playing with people. Yes, I could attract them.. I could manipulate them. My looks make them melt. Just the sight of me would make them remove their underwear and wave it to the air. Hmm.. yes... my kiss would make them fall for me more. they'd never know what I really am doing and saying behind their backs. I never meant what I said. I am Aki although my name is John Ross Gardiner. Hmm... Yes, playing with people is fun. they are so inferior, I am superior. I could dispose of them anytime.
I could convince them that I am sincere by slashing myself and trying to kill myself. Duh! They get convinced by my fake tears and my fake rage? Heh. Last last time, I made them think that I hated Luna for saying those mean words to my 'beloved'. But they're all stupid fools. I never despised Luna. I scolded at Luna when Nessa and I spoke, I even shed a tear... or two. I guess she's convinced...
Whatever. Right now, I'm kissing just another girl. A girl who loves me whom I can easily manipulate. Yes, she doesn't mind my breathe. What was the last cigar I smoke? Hmm... HOPE? L&M? I don't know. I don't care about my life since I'm useless... but using people is fun.
another one... it's an excerpt from a YM conversation... sorry for snooping around...
1: aki never went home since saturday up to monday ata
1: yep monday nga
2: then?
1: ang sabi niya sken kasma niya mga guy friends niya
1: umm lalake pala si luna
1: XD
1: gago gago niya
1: sinung ginagago niya eh katext ni jellix si luna
1: XD
2: Haha. oo nga!
2: Si Luna ay gurl... ka-message ko sha.
2: Patay na patay sha kay aki.
2: chikahan kami ni luna.
1: si jellix ng kwento na hindi umuwi
1: at ksma ni aki si luna the whole time
2: oh yah.
2: nagkagatan sila.
2: according to luna, that is.
1: huff huff
oh how i loathe him... sure, he's got the looks that fool everyone into thinking that he's such a goody-goody... and he's the guy that my girlfriend loves...
he's one heck of a fucked up liar, living in deception in this damned world...
well, we're both damned anyway... the only difference is that i still can save my soul from damnation...
his acting sucks... people just believe him because of his looks... nothing more... everything about him is fake... what is there to like about this guy?! really, those who were fooled by this idiot are idiots themselves...
who the hell he thinks he is?! using people for fun?! (please refer to his last sentence...) that would include my obsessed girlfriend!
i wish i can slam my girlfriend to a wall to make her see who she's dealing with...
what is it with him anyway?! those who actually like him are plain stupid! can't they see it in his eyes?! he's one fucked up guy!
okay, he's like me in some ways... we both claim to be on the Dark Side, we both love blood, we both think like the Devil, we both slash ourselves like crazy and we both change our personality to suit whoever we are with... his seven personalities? jeez, i have more than 10 personalities...
another thing, we both changed our name... his is for the cosplay world, mine is for the cyber world...
sure, we got stuff in common but i'm not anything like him at all... i'm not a schizo like him!
"galit ang magnanakaw sa kapwa magnanakaw"...
don't get me wrong... his life isn't an open book like he claims... he's got skeletons in his closet... so do i... but, to hell! at least i'm honest with my feelings for other people! i don't decieve them for my own gain and goal! and that's something someone like him will never ever learn!
i've read his journal in the forum i love (and now despise at the same time)... jeez... another one of his acts... his lies... can't he say something genuine even for once?!
he hides behind his perfect face, concealing how scarred he really is... he is as stubborn as me though...
the Lestat inside me loves him... for his stupidity... he thinks he has deceived me? no way... Lestat loves him in such a way that he awakes my vampiric blood... how i would love to drain him someday... he claims to be immortal, right? let me see if he'll still live after i drink his blood and consume his flesh...
or to make things easier, i'll just point my revolver right between his eyes and pull the trigger... or maybe i'll just take my knife and slash his body (that's what he always does anyway, right? it would please him at the same time)...
i simply want him to die in my own hands... how many times have i mentioned that?
here's a little conversation i had with Lestat one night while i watched him:
Lestat: why don't you let me act now?
Me: there are too many people... i'll get caught... i don't want to go to jail...
Lestat: it will be a swift death... you have your gun... i can quench my thisrt with someone else...
Me: but i know how much you want him...
Lestat: yes, you are right, my friend... his imperfect lies... he's nothing close to me... yet i want him... he tries to be like me in some ways...
Me: i don't think he knows about you...
Lestat: i am the Vampire Lestat! i'm the James Bond of the vampires! of course he knows all about me! with all the books i have written, surely he knows me...
Me: no offense meant there... but we have to wait... i don't him to have a swift and painless death... i want him to suffer in the same way he made me suffer, if not more...
Lestat: you sound like me more and more each day...
Me: you are inside me... what do you expect?
the minute he comes close to my girlfriend again, i will not hesitate to strike and do my dream: to finally kill him...
