fanfic!!!!! suck your brains out people... i'm goddamned insane... practically used the whole movie script and just changed the names... haha!

WARNING!!!

not for the weak of heart... ultimate yaoi bash!

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Bittersweet Symphony

==

In the game of seduction, there is only one rule: Never fall in love.

==

Justin Merteuil was, to put it simply, the most popular student at Manchester Prep. Being the student body president did that to you, however.

Justin knew he probably wouldn't have found himself in the situation he was in at that very moment, had he not been the head of the student body, but then again, he had requested that he see this new student. To take him under his wing, and make sure he turned out all right.

Ruin his life was more accurate.

"Justin, again, we can't thank you enough for helping Joey out, especially since he's new to the school."

Justin smiled at Mrs. Caldwell, the normal fake smile that just came naturally to him after years of perfecting it. "Of course, Mrs. Caldwell, I'm always happy to extend my hand to someone."

"What are the students like?" Joey asked.

Mrs. Caldwell laughed. "Joseph has never been in a "co-educational" school environment, and I'm sure that he's just asking to know all about the young ladies."

"I said -students-," Joey muttered, and Justin was the only one who heard him.

"Most of the students at Manchester are really great people. You do, however, get the occasional bad apples," Justin replied, giving Joey an odd look because of what he had said.

"Like your step-brother," Mrs. Caldwell pointed out. "I'm surprised they didn't expell him after what he did to the school nurse."

"I heard she's recovering quite nicely," Josh said, entering the room, a small book under one arm. He approached Mrs. Caldwell and leaned down to her ear. "Nice to see you again Mrs. Caldwell," he yelled.

She gave him a fleeting, fake smile and Josh turned to Joey. "And what have we here?" he asked.

"Josh, you remember Mrs. Caldwell's son, Joey," Justin said, looking from Josh to Joey.

Josh smiled. "Oh yes, Joey. And I just have to say, that is an -adorable- shirt that you're wearing." Joey looked down at his tee shirt with a koala bear on it, and grinned. "Oh thanks, my dad got it for me in Australia."

"So how are things down under?" Josh asked, eyes roaming down to look at Joey's crotch. "Josh!" Justin hissed, smacking the side of his leg.

"Well, I think we've covered everything. Come along Joseph," Mrs. Caldwell said, getting up and stalking off, her high heels clicking on the ground. "Remember to keep your legs together, this isn't Jamaica," she hissed to Joey as they left the room.

"God," Justin said, rolling his eyes and reaching for the cross he wore around his neck, with the initials JRM inscribed in them. He twisted the tip if the cross and it opened up, revealing his vile of cocaine.

"I didn't know it was ass hole day at the Valmont house!" Josh exclaimed, setting his small book on the table by the phone.

"The parental units called while you were out," Justin said, wiping his nose and screwing the top of his cross back on, making it look like a normal piece of jewelry once again.

"So how is your gold digging, whore of a mother?" Josh asked.

"She suspects that your impotent, alcoholic father is diddling the maid."

"Good for him," Josh sneered.

"What's the matter with you? -Therapy- not going well?"

Josh sighed. "No, it's not that." He pulled out a napkin from his pocket. "Clarissa. Call me," he mimicked, throwing the napkin behind him. "I'm sick and tired of sleeping with these insipid Manhattan debutons. Nothing shocks them anymore. It's never a challenge."

Justin grinned. "Well you can stop fretting, because I have a challenge for you. It involves Joey."

"I -knew- you weren't just associating with him out of the goodness of your heart."

"Just shut up and listen. Do you remember Court Reynolds?"

Josh thought about it for a second before replying, "That guy that dumped you over the Fourth of July weekend?"

"Great sacrifices were made on my part to keep Court happy. Little did I know he was going to fall for none other than our boy Joey. He dumped me for the innocent little twit, and I want revenge. If you seduce him, sleep with him, then he'll only be damaged goods by the time poor Court gets to him."

Josh pretended to think about it, before shaking his head. "No."

"Why not?" Justin demanded.

"Oh come on Justin! It's too easy. You want a challenge?" Josh asked, going over to his small book and pulling out a magazine from underneath it.

"This is a challenge," he said, putting the Seventeen magazine in Justin's lap.

"Thanks Josh, but I don't need to know how to alleviate menstrual cramps."

"Just turn to page sixty-four."

"Getting a Guy's Perspective?" Justin asked, reading the page headline, and Josh sighed. "Below that."

"Why I Plan To Wait, by Lance Hargrove; Laurel, Mississippi... God, is he for real?" Justin muttered as he started to read the article.

"Oh, he's the family angel..." Josh said, trailing his hands over Justin's chest, rubbing his nipples through the thin fabric.

"Let's see," Josh pulled the magazine out of Justin's hands and started reading from it. "Boring, boring, boring... 'I love my parents'... boring, boring, boring... 'making a mature decision'... here we go! It says here that he has a -boyfriend- named Trevor. They've been going out for a year, and Trevor understands."

"Trevor's a pussy," Justin said. "Too bad for you, though, that he lives in Mississippi."

"Au contraire, dear brother. The virgin's father has just accepted the new headmaster position at -our- school."

Josh came over and sat on a seat next to Justin. "Can you imagine what this will do for my reputation? Screwing the new headmaster's son before school starts... he'll be my greatest victory."

Justin looked at Josh with a smirk. "You don't stand a chance. Even this is out of your league."

"Care to make a wager out of that?"

"Maybe," Justin said with a shrug.

"Oh well," Josh said, getting up and walking over to the table he had set his book on. "Dr. Greenbaum and her daughter should make for an interesting entry."

"Oh gee, your journal. Could you be more queer?"

"Could you be more desperate to read it?" Josh asked, leaving the large room and going into his study, setting his journal on top of his desk. He opened the flap and was just about to write in it, when Justin's voice came floating in across the hall from his bedroom.

"Oh Josh, could you come here please?"

Josh sighed and walked across the hall into Justin's room. "What?" he asked.

"About that little wager of yours, count me in."

Josh smiled triumphantly. "All right, what are the terms."

"If I win, then that hot little car of yours is mine."

"And if I win?"

Justin backed up onto his bed, and he leaned back, spreading his legs apart, moving his hand down between them. "Then I'll give you something you've been obsessing about ever since our parents got married."

"Be.More.Specific," Josh told Justin, pausing after each word.

"In English? I'll fuck your brains out."

Josh hesitated before saying, "What makes you think I'd go for that? My car's a 1956 Jaguar Roadster."

Justin grinned and laid back seductively on the bed. "Because I'm the only one you can't have and it kills you. I'll let you put it anywhere."

Josh grinned victoriously. "You've got yourself a bet."

They shook on it.

*************************

Josh found it much to his good fortune that not only was Lance going to attend Manchester in the fall, but that Lance himself was staying with Josh's aunt while his parents looked for a house. How was that for irony?

He pulled up to the large country mansion in his car. `The one I don't plan to lose,' he thought.

Out in the gardens, where Josh could neither hear nor see, was his aunt, Helen Valmont, and Lance, riding two horses. They were having a pleasant everyday conversation, and Lance was enjoying himself quite well. The gunshot startled him. The second one frightened him.

Helen laughed and said, "Joshua's home."

Lance had no idea who she was talking about. They rode their horses to an open area in the gardens, and Lance caught sight of a tall, brunette man in very stylish clothes. He suddenly felt a little foolish in his blue jeans and white shirt.

Josh heard the approaching horses and turned around, smiling when he saw his aunt and Lance. "Aunt Helen!" he exclaimed, running over to her. She got off her horse and they hugged, and Lance felt very awkward.

"Joshua, this is Lance Hargrove. Lance, this is my nephew Joshua." Lance nodded his hello and turned to dismount his horse, but he felt Josh's hands around his waist, pulling him down. "Thank you," he said, a little shortly. It had taken a moment, but Lance remembered who Josh was perfectly from the letter.

"Aunt Helen, why don't you go whip us up some of that famous iced tea of yours? I'll show Lance around." Helen smiled and nodded, and Josh took Lance's hand in his, pulling him along.

"So, how do you like the country so far?" Josh asked as they reached the steps up into the back part of the mansion.

"It's very lovely," he said.

"So... I read your manifesto. I found it a little... appalling."

"Really? Most people praised me for it."

Josh looked at Lance in disbelief. "Who are you to criticize something you've never even experienced?"

"I wasn't criticizing it, I just think that you shouldn't experience the act of love until you -are- in love."

"And you're not in love?"

Lance looked at Josh before saying, "Look, you can stop wasting your time, I know perfectly well why you're here, and it isn't to give me grief about my beliefs. I know that you promise anyone you've got your mind set on the world, just so you can get them in bed."

Josh wasn't prepared for that one, and Lance having the one up on him would certainly make the whole thing harder. "Who...who told you that?"

"A friend wrote me," Lance said simply.

"We'll that's a little tacky."

"That's not the point, the point is that you can go back to the city and stop wasting your time, because your mind games aren't going to work on me."

Josh gave Lance a sarcastic smile. "Well, it's just too bad for you that I'm here visiting my aunt, isn't it?"

They'd known each other for five minutes and they already despised one another.

*

Justin stood outside the door of the large room in Joey's house, watching as he played the cello, his teacher sitting behind him, arms guiding Joey's, and Justin got more than a teaching vibe from the both of them.

He looked over, and saw a small box resting on a bookshelf. He knocked it onto the floor, turning to his Vietnamese maid. "Mai Lee! I'm so sorry, I've told her about doing that before."

Joey smiled. "Hi Justin. This is Chris, he's teaching me how to play the cello."

Chris nodded a hello to Justin, and Justin just have him a half grin. "Do you have a moment, Joey?"

Joey nodded. "We were done. See you tomorrow, Chris?" Chris smiled at Joey and patted his shoulder before taking his music and leaving the room.

"Chris is a student at a musical college, and he's working on his first musical play. He's also really good at listening to problems and stuff," Joey babbled, moving his arm in invisible motions.

"That's great, Joey. I was thinking, though, that me and you should go out. How does a picnic sound?"

Joey grinned in excitement, and Justin had to hold back an insult.

They got to the park and laid out the things Justin had brought, and soon they were drinking fine wine and eating pâté. Not Joey's idea of a picnic, but whatever made Justin happy.

"So, rumor has it that you are Court Reynolds are an item," Justin said, making it sound like casual conversation. Joey nodded. "Oh yeah, but all he ever does is talk about this psychotic loser that he dumped during the summer."

"Psychotic loser... how interesting. And have you and Court... you know..." Justin prodded.

"Oh no!" Joey said, a look of shock on his face. "I'm not really all that interested in Court, anyways. Plus, I've never even been to first base with someone."

"Well, haven't you ever tried on one of your friends?"

Joey looked at Justin like he had just grown another head. "Um, no." Justin grinned and shifted positions so he was face to face with Joey. "Well, how are you ever going to get good if you don't practice?"

"I... I don't, I mean..."

"Just do as I say, all right? Just close your eyes, I promise, I'll go slow." Joey did as he was told, and Justin leaned in, his mouth brushing Joey's for just the briefest of moments. "See," Justin said as he pulled away. "That wasn't so bad."

Joey, eyes still closed, smiled. "No, that wasn't bad at all. That was fun!" Justin rolled his eyes quickly before Joey could see, and then said, "Now this time, I'm going to put my tongue in your mouth, and you're going to rub your tongue on mine, and that's what getting to first base is. Are you ready?"

Joey nodded, and Justin moved in again, probing Joey's mouth with his tongue. Joey's mouth opened and it rubbed against Justin's, licking it as if it was a popsicle or an ice cream cone. Before pulling away, Justin gently bit down on Joey's tongue.

"That was so cool," Joey said, in awe.

"Now maybe you could practice on your friend Chris sometime," Justin said, going for the casual suggestion tone again.

"Wh...what?" Joey asked, looking at Justin with wide eyes.

"You do like him, don't you?" Justin questioned, leaning back, sticking his shoulders out.

Joey stood up suddenly, putting his hand on his forehead and pacing back and forth. "I do! I like him so much! I just... I don't know!" Joey sat back down, and he looked at Justin with a secretive, gleeful look. "He writes me love letters you know."

Justin grinned in mock happiness and surprise. "Love letters? All right Joey, here's what I want you to do. Have you saved the letters?"

Joey nodded. "In one of my old boxes of legos."

"All right, I want you to make copies of the letters and bring them to me. If there's one thing I'm good at, it's love letters."

"All right! This is great! Um, Justin? Do you like... wanna hang out this weekend or something?"

Justin just gave Joey a falsetto friendly look. Inside, he was already forming a plan inside his head.

Maybe he wouldn't need Josh to bring Court down.

Then again, watching the whole thing would be one hell of a great time.