i really hate myself whenever i lose my temper... i become obsessive-compulsive and i lose control of myself...



yesterday was one of my worst days ever... it wasn't supposed to be that way... i was with the girl i love, for crying out loud! but certain factors ruined everything...



kuya anton, i hate you for being the jerk that you are... i hate you for putting me through the very same agony that my mom does every single time i'm alone with her... i hate you for saying stuff that you weren't supposed to say and doing practically everything that i find annoying... you put me in a situation where you know i won't be able to counter your silly attacks... you have no idea how much i want to kill you right now...



heart, i hate you for being the immature child that you are... i hate you for not doing anything to save me from the idiot that is also known as your boyfriend... i hate you for staying quiet and playing ignorant to everything that has been happening around you when you know very well what pisses me off... i guess that's how much you love him - you'll let your friend get tortured...



kuya aidz, i'm mad at you for judging me according to my actions... you hardly know me and you have the nerve to tell me such things?! you don't even know the whole story!



plushie, i ain't mad at you... not at all... i just didn't expect you to go with kuya anton's insanity... i didn't expect you to snap right back at me for saying the wrong things at the wrong time... i didn't expect you to strike me at my weak point - my heart... but i guess it was all for the sake of having a great time...



i'm really sorry, plushie... i know its all my fault and i understand you... i'm sorry for acting the way i did, for giving them wrong ideas about us... i just really missed you a lot and i was really psyched to be with you again that i forgot to control myself...



yesterday was like a trip back to my old life, when i was abandoned by everybody for being me...



but that was yesterday, not tonight... i could never change what has already happened...



Careless Whisper
George Michael/Hyde of L'arc-en-ciel



I feel so unsure,
As I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor.
As the music dies...
Something in your eyes,
Calls to mind a silver screen,
And all those sad goodbyes.



Chorus:
I'm never gonna dance again,
Guilty feet have got no rhythm.
Though it's easy to pretend,
I know you're not a fool.



I should have known better than to cheat a friend,
And waste the chance that I'd been given.
So I'm never gonna dance again,
The way I danced with you.



Time can never mend,
The careless whispers of a good friend.
To the heart and mind,
Ignorance is kind...
There's no comfort in the truth,
Pain is all you'll find.



Chorus
I'm never gonna dance again,
Guilty feet have got no rhythm.
Though it's easy to pretend,
I know you're not a fool.



I should have known better than to cheat a friend,
And waste the chance that I'd been given.
So I'm never gonna dance again,
The way I danced with you.



What am I without your love?



Tonight the music seems so loud,
I wish that we could lose the crowd.
Maybe it's better this way,
We'd hurt each other with the things we want to say.



We could have been so good together,
We could have made this last forever...
But now, who's gonna dance with me?
Please stay.
(Alternatively):
And now it's never gonna be
That way...



Chorus
Now that you're gone
Now that you're gone
Now that you're gone
Was what I did so wrong?
So wrong that you had to leave me alone?



you guys really ruined my day like hell... i don't even think i'd want to go out with you all again... i'd prefer to be alone with my plushie...



i could only hope and pray that that traumatic day won't ever happen again...



have faith in me, plushie... i won't let them misjudge you... i'll protect you... they really crossed the line this time and i'm gonna make them pay...